Dear Daughters: Take a Ham

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Dear Daughters,

If you want to be the

Queen of the Covered Dish,

which has its merits and does not involve a swimsuit competition

or twirling fire batons,

take a ham.


I realized this when I put a pencil to it.

Here are the choices:

Plan A

Drive to Wal Mart to purchase ingredients for a moderately priced but allegedly delicious casserole.

Become distracted in the spray paint department with a new variety of metallic gold spray paint . Put 2 cans in your basket.

After all Christmas is right around the corner.

Push your basket through the garden department and spot miniature pots of succulents- your latest obsession.

Place three in your basket.  

Cruise past the magazine aisle and spot all of the new Christmas magazines.
Grab one and throw it in your basket.


Decide its time to head toward the grocery department.

Locate your ingredients and head to the checkout counter.


Ask yourself how a simple casserole could cost $42.00.

Or-

Plan B

Drive to Wal Mart.

Find a small to medium sized spiral sliced ham .

Put it in your basket.

Head to the checkout counter and pay the $20(ish)

price.

Head home with a self satisfied smile on your face.


Locate your crown and put it on.

Grocery Shopping

When I was growing up, my mother used simple ingredients to create delicious food. We travelled to the nearest grocery store, which was 45 miles north of the ranch, loaded up several baskets, signed the ticket and headed home- breaking into a sack of cookies along the way.

Note: The long term effects of signing tickets and eating cookies randomly is a topic for another day.

My mother had a gold Toronado (remember those?), and she drove fast. Can you picture this? We certainly didn’t want the ice cream to melt.

We had one of these waiting in the garage when we arrived home, so unloading was not a big deal.

She somehow persuaded the manager at HEB in Falfurrias, Texas to lend her one for the duration. Unloading was easy and efficient, especially since the sidewalk from the driveway to the back door was about 50 yards.

Once inside, we put things away- not in a pantry but in a shallow, three can deep cabinet, from the floor up about six feet, that she had built next to the refrigerator. She taught me that a shallow cabinet for canned goods was better. Canned goods were not the no-no that some cooks profess today.

Confession: I love Del Monte whole green beans with a hamburger patty, grilled onions, and a glass of tea. When I am working on it ,that seems to off-set cookie jamming spells.

When you live on a ranch 45 miles from town, stocking up is important. I love to stock up. Most collectors do, don’t they?

(I’m off to the hospital to see my father. I stuck his hunting flashlight into the bag I am taking him- in case he needs to check things out after dark.)