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Friday, May 22, 2009

Welcome to New Normal, Texas

    Tonight as I write this in one of my ‘pondering’ moods, I am sitting in a hotel room, attached to a major hospital , in a major city in Texas, close to seven hours away from home. My husband, who had surgery in late April, had to return to the hospital because of serious complications.  He has had two surgeries in the last week, and he is scheduled for a fourth surgery in two weeks. In rank order, my husband, my daughters, my friends and family, and my laptop have saved my sanity.

     I keep saying to my husband, we are OK, this is going to be OK; this for a time is our new normal.

     What does New Normal, Texas  look like?

                            First, I make my nest.

     I make it in the hospital room, the hotel room, my car, and even my purse. I sort through what I need with what little I threw in the car last Saturday, and I touch it and rearrange it and then do it again if necessary.

     I strip the hospital bed and place the sheets that need washing near the door- as if I am going to take them to my own laundry room right down the hall. I use a damp towel and mop the floor while swiping it with my feet. I wipe and stack and straighten edges and then I do it again.

                 Secondly, I honor ( as do my husband and  daughters), the worker bees , the people in the trenches that ease the fear and the pain, and I ask eye to eye tough questions of those who think they are the King Bees.

     We say thank you and excuse me , and we edify at every opportunity those worker bees whose names I will not write but whose faces are imprinted on my heart. To the King Bees, you know who you are. I am still not through with my questions, nor is our oldest daughter- which leads to-

                 Thirdly, I watch my oldest daughter be the empowered young woman, wife, mother, and attorney that she is.

     I giggled many times and thought of my mother’s knowing smile, when one of the King Bees from time to time has said, “Your daughter said…”

     You bet she said, clicking down the hospital hallway in her high heels.

     Today I watched our middle daughter, our voice of reason, our stay the course daughter, our adventurer daughter anticipate the very next thing we needed , before we knew we even needed it. She listened and stood quietly- our rock, our fixer.

     I listened to the voice of our youngest daughter , who is sick and coming down with something, say “Tell Dad I’m coming in the morning Mom.”

     I listened to my husband say to us, if we got too loud while he was resting , “Ya’ll don’t need to stop talking.”

                     Welcome to New Normal, Texas.

 

24 comments:

trash talk said...

Laura,
Since I just recently resided in Normal, Texas myself I just have one question....What can I do to help?
Debbie

Preppy 101 said...

I tried to find an email address for you to write you cause I don't want to get too personal in this comment, but I may have been in that very hotel in 1995 with my husband. Are you in Houston? Regardless, you are in my thoughts and prayers. The title of this post is so on point. I am so glad you have your daughters. You can email me if you wish. preppy101@bellsouth.net xoxo to you!!

Bellamere Cottage said...

Sweet and dear Laura....I'm praying for all of you....

Big huge hugs,
Spencer

Elizabethd said...

Laura, I was where you are, only in Normal France, last year when my husband had a stroke. I will be praying for you, I know how hard it is.

marty39 said...

Laura, I think we've all lived in New Normal somewhere, but it is never a great or easy place to live. You and your family are all in my prayers. I hope your DH has a very successful surgery and a speedy recovery. God Bless. Hugs, Marty

Kim Evans Pigue said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kim Evans Pigue said...

Laura, I have you and your family on my prayer list.

Sue said...

Laura, I can only say that I hope things work out well for your husband and I send a wish that things return to as normal as possible for you. I'm glad you have a support system in place with your immediate family. Sue

Domestic Designer said...

I completely understand. Last year at this same time I was in a "new normal" phase of life at an hospital 13 hours away from family and friends. Your "activities" sound very familiar and bring back some memories. The one thing I could count on was the prayers of those back home. You and your family can certainly count on my prayers as you go through this "new normal" phase. I am a nurse, so you tell those worker bees to take good care of you! :-) God Bless. DD

Dixie said...

Laura.. I know there is nothing your friends here in bloggerland can really do for you except to pray and lend their emotional support... so, for you and your family... I pray for strength and healing... and for you, Dear Laura... you know we are here and on your side... and will read what you need to write.

God Bless. Dixie

Cathy said...

Laura,
I am still praying for you and your family. I wish there was more that I could do...but prayer is a powerful thing and I will just stick with that. Know that I am here and am in full support of you. I am listening.

Sending you my love and prayers!!!
XOXO
Cathy

Melissa Miller said...

I'm praying for your husband's full recovery Laura.

~Take Care, ~Melissa :)

Joy said...

Laura, I'm praying for you and this huge adjustment. Will you e-mail me please If you are in Houston, I want to offer some local support. www.joy(dot)brasington(at)gmail.com


Joy

The Stylish House said...

Laura,
I am sorry your husband and family are going through this. I have dealt with serious medical so definitely sympathize with what you are facing. I have learned a nifty technique for how to sleep in one of those lovely hospital chairs, just give me a rolled up jacket and I am good for several hours. Did you know that Twinkies and Ding Dongs from the vending machine count as a health food at 3:00 am? This too shall pass hopefully sooner then later, my thoughts and prayers have been with you and will continue. My best to your husband. ~Cathy~

kate said...

Still thinking about your and your family and wishing for the best.
kate

Lou Cinda said...

Laura: I have been where you are too, only it was with my parents, at different times! I will pray for success and speed recovery for your dear husband and am so glad your daughters are with you!! God will sustain you and we are here to "hear" you...

Keeping you close in my heart and prayers!!

Lou Cinda

LDH said...

Dear Laura, You and your husband are in my prayers, as well. Your daughters seem like great encouragers and helpful to you. I am sure the presence of those closest to him is a great blessing to your husband.

Looking forward to posts that he is recuperating well and you are back to your NORMAL normal!

Jodie LeJeune said...

Oh girl, I was visiting you today hoping there would be good news and not expecting to see that he is back in the hospital. Thank you for sharing this post today. I know it's hard to put your personal life out there but now you can be sure that the more people who care about you, the more prayers will be sent your way!!! So there IS good news after all!!!!
I'm sending lots your way...
everything vintage

K :) Family Historian said...

sending prayers your way. i can relate to finding a new normal and struggle with living there each and every day. god bless all of you.

Stacey said...

Laura, I will continue to pray for your family. You seem to have such a good attitude and that is so important. We've had to adjust to some New Normal in our marriage too..not that was life threatening though. Just know that you have a lot of people thinking of you!

Cher said...

As hard as it seems to believe, this too shall pass. But it sure takes its sweet time about it, doesn't it? You're both in my thoughts!

The Texas Woman

Mrs. Rabe said...

Laura, I just found you on my followers list and am here at your home on the web to say hi! I am sorry that your husband has been having a tough time. I prayed for him and you that the surgeries will take care of the issues and all will be well. I am enjoying reading your blog! I hope to become better acquainted with you!

Glenda/MidSouth said...

You are both in my thoughts and prayers. Please take care of yourself.
Glenda

Annie said...

Laura,

If that big Texas city is Houston. I have a guest room for you, just down the road from the medical center. Just e-mail me and I'll send you my phone number and address.

Annie

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